livinlargeinsf

yes, the title says it all. aah…spring.

forget christmas. forget the last day of school. forget the day i got those test results back from the free clinic.  my favorite day of the year has to be that first warm, beautiful spring day when the sundresses come out and the inhibitions stay in.  yes, it is mating time in the animal kingdom and with that comes not only cotton sundresses but also many swollen vaginas.

there isn’t much i like more than a nice, big, swollen vagina. of course, we’re not speaking of a vagina which is swollen due to hives or a case of the mumps, nor are we referring to one which is swollen due to it being punched or beaten. we are, in fact, referring to one which has increased blood flow due to the heightened sexual arousal experienced as a result of an increase in the levels of certain hormones.  i really, really love whore-mones.

in other words, babes are super horny RIGHT NOW.  whether it’s the red-breasted warbler, a baboon, or maxine in accounting, this is your best opportunity all year to get off the bench and get into the game for pretty much across the board the female species is looking to hump.   particularly right out of the gates of the spring season is your best opportunity to engage in coitus with girls whom the rest of the year wouldn’t look at you twice.  they’ve been cooped up all winter, have fresh waxings and are lookin’ to party.  well what do you know? I’m actually holding a party in about five minutes under my scrotal sack.  refreshments will be served and you are most certainly invited.

bring your friends and i’ll see you there!!!