livinlargeinsf

in true livinlargeinsf style i rang the new year in at a tranny party.  now, why on earth would i go somewhere with single, horny women when i can hang out with a bunch of horny chicks with dicks? 

i’m kidding.  what do you think i am, a freak? T-R-A-N-N-Y as in transvestite,  not transexual. 

because i’m cooler than even i give myself credit,  i had numerous options for new year’s.  during the selection process one particular party seemed to keep popping up more than the others.  i took stock of the selection criteria.  friends were going? check.  there’d be hot chicks? check.  it wasn’t crazy expensive? check.  sure, we’ll take a limo there but after i get shitfaced,  spend all of my money on illicit drugs and lose my friends in the confusion ,  i’ll be able to walk home? check.  

i was still undecided.  my buddy then ’pulled at my penis-strings,’  if you will.  he brought to my attention how, with all of the gay men that would be at this party, there would be very few straight guys with whom i would need to compete. hmm.  that could be interesting.  you mean to tell me i’d be one of the very few straight dudes to reap the new year’s eve ‘goodie-bag,’  so to speak?  that’s all i needed to hear.  i was certain this year’s goodie-bag would include,  at the the very least,  some heavy face sucking and some even heavier petting, maybe i’d even get to rub my special purpose on some babe while dancing.  niiiice. 

unfortunately,  my bag was filled simply with the smell of farts. 

now,  i know what some of you are thinking.  you’ve already suspected me of playing for both teams and this is the final nail-in-the-coffin.  think what you may…

so anyway, i decided on the tranny party.  there were,  in total,  7 girls in the entire place.  this included the two lesbians with whom i went and the two female bartenders.  ouch.  all of my gay friends pull wool.  what happened?  oh, well. that’s cool,  i thought.  i don’t always have to have babes around me…

the above picture was taken as i was scanning the crowd during the ball-drop(mine were still in my stomach,) my only respite from the heavy artillery fire which had been blanketing me.  i was looking for the bald guy with whom i’d been dancing.  uh, what?  or the other dude that rubbed up against me.  or that one guy that grabbed me.  then there was that other guy who cornered me.  or the guy from the bathroom who had an eye twitch which forced him to look down and to the left.  unfortunately that’s also where my penis was located while standing at the urinal,  peeing.  then, of course,  there was that gentleman who bought me the drink. 

now, that was actually pretty cool… 

it’s comforting to know that if i should ever begin pirating for butt,  i’ll reap much booty.  happy new year.