the wool pull factor (wpf)
November 4, 2007
in a new twist on good taste i am unveiling the ‘wool pull factor’ to all livinlargeinsf readers. what is the ‘wool pull factor?’ funny you should ask.
let’s start by discussing what it’s not. it has nothing to do with pulling lint balls off of sweaters, nor is it a measurement of a lonely shepherd’s proclivity towards relying on the flock for ‘dates.’
it is, however, a ranking system inspired by the incomparable dewey decimal system (uh, what?) it is a way to quantify the intangible. it is also the path to summing up the likelihood of an establishment having a girl in it who is going to want to have sex with you, or rather me, since i’m the one calling all the shots. i realize these results may be somewhat skewed since i’m me, and lots of women want to have sex with me, and you’re you, and you haven’t had sex since college when that girl vomited on you (sorry to bring that up.)
i will do my best to factor all of this in with an incredibly complicated equation compliments of my friends at MIT. the final value will be on a scale of 1-10 with 10 meaning that girls are drunk, girls are horny and said girls are throwing themselves at guys. yes, even guys like you. you are welcome.
November 19, 2007 at 4:50 am
[...] me. other times it actually draws some pretty hot chicks. taking all factors into account, the wool pull factor of the lush lounge, surprisingly, ranks as a ‘7.’ Posted in places to drink [...]
November 19, 2007 at 4:51 am
[...] wool pull factor for divas?………………..‘-246′ or if you are really [...]
November 19, 2007 at 4:52 am
[...] wool pull factor for the high tide?…………. ‘6′ Posted in places to drink [...]
November 19, 2007 at 5:48 am
[...] bar has a wool pull factor of………………..8.5 why so low considering my rave [...]
December 7, 2007 at 7:49 am
[...] i have devised the ‘funk factor’ to clear up any confusion. different from the ‘wool pull factor,’ but just as powerful, the ‘funk factor’ will also be on a scale from 1 to 10. [...]
January 15, 2008 at 8:06 am
[...] i engaged in a one-night stand after meeting her at the lush lounge(which by the way has a current wool pull factor of 7.5.) she had the softest skin ever felt by a human hand. she had a beautiful tattoo [...]
March 29, 2008 at 3:20 am
[...] wool-pull factor, at-least on the weekend, currently ranks as an ‘8.’ i’ve been during the [...]